The post below first appeared on the blog ‘Wise Words – Book Blogger.’ Thank you to Louise Wise, book blogger, for featuring me and my book. It was great fun getting into the head of Steve Regan once more.

The idea is that one of my fictional characters, in this case Steve Regan, talks about current affairs. Who The F*ck Am I? is Book One in the Steve Regan Undercover Cop Series and it is set in 1976. He is addressing the issues surrounding the UK’s contemporary Undercover Policing Inquiry. The rest is self-explanatory.

If fictional characters were real and LIVED ALONGSIDE US @StephenBentley8 #1970s #crime

…from the mind of a fictional character
Steve Regan
(character from the book Who The F*ck Am I?
(Steve Regan Undercover Cop Book 1  written by Stephen Bentley)
Year: 1976
Place: United Kingdom
Steve Regan, fictional undercover cop, if allowed to peer into the future would throw his hands up in horror to learn of the existence of the UK’s Undercover Policing Inquiry.
“Hey, Red! I had a strange dream about the future. The government had set up an inquiry into undercover policing.”
“You have to be kidding me!” Red said.
Regan carried on explaining all to his undercover buddy, Red.
As he explained, Regan came to understand the inquiry became necessary owing to undercover agents in London’s Metropolitan Police Service (MPS) regularly engaging in dirty tactics.
They were part of a department so secret that the Commissioner of the MPS knew nothing about it or its activities.
One of the most abhorrent things that came to light was many of these undercover cops had taken on false identities stolen from dead children. To make matters even worse, if that is possible, many struck up long term relationships with women who had no idea who they were really sleeping with. Some of those women had children by these undercover cops.
In Regan’s dream he initially believed such disgusting tactics could never have existed in his time, 1976. But, then he learned that it had been going on as far back as the early 1970’s. He thought, ‘No wonder I never knew if the MPS Commissioner was in the dark.’
Regan started to dig deeper around the issues unearthed by the government inquiry. He did not know whether to laugh or cry at some of the things he discovered.
“Hey Red! The College of Policing have issued a rule book about what undercover cops can and cannot do. Guess what? We are prohibited from using drugs!”
“Now you’re talking crazy, Regan. What’s that stuff you’re smoking?”
In disbelief, Regan read all about these new guidelines for undercover cops in the new rule book. He was alarmed to read that UC’s, as they are now called, would be subjected to random drug tests and if found to be positive would result in both disciplinary and criminal proceedings.
“The future’s gone mad. How the hell do they expect us to infiltrate drug cartels if we can’t use ourselves? Okay, no one would inject but smoking weed or an occasional line of cocaine is all part of the job.”
Red nodded his head.
“What are we supposed to do? Tell them we can’t smoke weed because we are undercover cops?” Regan said.
Regan reflected a while before he finalized his conclusion. “Red, my friend, this is what happens when the bad apples lose all sense of propriety. It screws it for everyone. I’m glad I was undercover back in the day. I don’t like what I see in the future.”
Red shrugged, at the same time handing Regan what he was smoking.
Note for non-UK readers: there really is a UK Undercover Policing Inquiry.

Steve Regan in the feature image illustrated by Kelly Wallace-Artieri. You may contact her through us by emailing for cover art work requirements.


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